Posted 10 hours ago

omnbvc:

i am demisexual meaning i am only attracted to those born of gods or who are themselves a diety. move out of the way assholes, i’m gonna fuck zeus

Posted 10 hours ago

pmon3y69:

drdawg:

my friend Pete literally makes me cry with his snap stories

this is me, i am pete, love me 

Posted 10 hours ago

i-m-obnoxious:

DO NOT SKIP OVER THIS POST
YOU WON’T REGRET IT

(Source: d-dinosaur)

Posted 10 hours ago

kristenwiiggle:

DONT LOOK ME IN THE EYES IF THIS ISNT YOUR TOP FIVE FAVE SONGS.

Posted 10 hours ago
methhomework:

turn up for jesus

methhomework:

turn up for jesus

Posted 10 hours ago

thatsqualitystuff:

Prisoner zero has escaped

(Source: awwww-cute)

Posted 10 hours ago

suspend:

i hope iphone 6 is a flip phone

Posted 10 hours ago

narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

Posted 10 hours ago

(Source: fuks)

Posted 10 hours ago
Posted 10 hours ago

dubstepfordads:

helping my little brother with his wordsearch and found this shit

Posted 10 hours ago
Posted 10 hours ago

vinebox:

That laugh tho

Posted 10 hours ago

theramen:

wellhellotello:

fckingmajeliblood:

so-much-hilarity:

I keep having to remind myself that it’s the lionesses that do the hunting and killing and get their faces soaked in blood I mean is there a more badass animal

the king of the jungle

in the second it’s like ‘maybe if I look away she’ll stop yelling at me’

I TOLD YO BITCH ASS TO PICK UP THE CUBS

Posted 10 hours ago
technocat:

motherfucker what is this shit, sand? fuck sand. i hate sand. thanks, mom. thanks for absolutely nothing, leaving me here on this fucking beach, is that a fucking seagull? oh my god, mom, you suck more than anything has ever sucked. i’m getting to that ocean just so i can urinate on your carapace. i’m gonna urinate on it so hard. fucking sand. i think five of my brothers just got eaten. good, i hated those assholes. i’m coming, mom. you’ve got blood on your flippers, bitch.

technocat:

motherfucker what is this shit, sand? fuck sand. i hate sand. thanks, mom. thanks for absolutely nothing, leaving me here on this fucking beach, is that a fucking seagull? oh my god, mom, you suck more than anything has ever sucked. i’m getting to that ocean just so i can urinate on your carapace. i’m gonna urinate on it so hard. fucking sand. i think five of my brothers just got eaten. good, i hated those assholes. i’m coming, mom. you’ve got blood on your flippers, bitch.

(Source: wolf-teeth)